Stingers

Darwin has more than its fair share of halfwitted revhead dickheads whose idea of fun is spending all Friday and Saturday nights doing donuts, wheelies and burnouts around otherwise quiet suburban streets. The cops are never in evidence.

As I lie awake for hours listening to these pricks, I often fantasise how nice it would be to have a shoulder-launched missile and terminate them with extreme prejudice. The scary thing is that sometimes I end up in such a sleep-deprived impotent rage that I might well do it if I actually had one. It’s one of the best arguments for tough gun control laws.

About Ken Parish

Ken Parish is a legal academic, with research areas in public law (constitutional and administrative law), civil procedure and teaching & learning theory and practice. He has been a legal academic for almost 20 years. Before that he ran a legal practice in Darwin for 15 years and was a Member of the NT Legislative Assembly for almost 4 years in the early 1990s.
This entry was posted in Life. Bookmark the permalink.
6 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
bailz
bailz
2022 years ago

You know you can build a crude mid-range projectile pretty easily with the right now-how dude.

Engineering degree paying for itself.

AndyM
AndyM
2022 years ago

Ken

That’s a coincidence. I always fantasised about having a hip-hop seeking shoulder launched missile system to destroy Toranas cruising past my house. If I can get one accurate enough to destroy the Kenwood stereo propped up on the rear dash and leave the passengers with no eyebrows (or eyebrow), I’ll be a happy man.

Andy

Andy

Geoff Honnor
Geoff Honnor
2022 years ago

There are other ways…..our house has a Cook’s River frontage. A leafy park is located on the other side of the river and for some reason it attracts a whole bunch of people who see it as the ideal spot for nocturnal discussions of their relationship issues. Over the inevitable accompaniment of ‘doof,doof’ car surroundsound, a tedious stream of booze – and really bad drugs – fuelled accusations, counter-accusations
wild sobbing and hysterical rage, fills the early hours.

Our neighbour – a public-spirited GP – is currently working on a jet propelled syringe transporter that will deliver lethal doses of narcotic analgesic direct to target. Will keep you posted.

Norman
Norman
2022 years ago

I think you’ll find that on a cost/benefit analysis, not to mention availability and required training, it’s hard to go past a rifle; unless, of course, you have belladonna or some suitable alternative growing in the backyard.

Yobbo
2022 years ago

You could always slash their tyres. Won’t cost a thing!

Gummo Trotsky
2022 years ago

I have relatives who swear by the propane spud-mortar. Cheap to build & arm and easy to fire. And about as legal as oral sex in Minnesota.