I had a terrible shock a few minutes ago. As I walked out of my bedroom about to leave for the office (after a morning of updating the NTU website from home), I came face to face with a Catholic nun standing at the front door. Lord forgive me! I instantly thought. They always said “be sure your sins will find you out”, and now judgment was at hand.
Fortunately it wasn’t so. Sister Bridget was just chasing up a copy of Rebecca’s Baptism Certificate that we’d forgotten to give her at Confirmation a couple of years ago. So I can continue with my life of unrepentant sin for a while longer yet. I didn’t have the heart to tell Sister that Rebecca presently gives every indication of embracing a life of pagan, hedonistic excess with equally great enthusiasm. Sister Bridget probably has enough crosses to bear already. On the other hand, Rebecca did suggest we go to Mass last Christmas morning, but only because she likes singing the carols.
….and I thought you were going to reveal that she was an emissary from Above cautioning you about reigniting the History Wars…. :)
I was expecting to hear that Ken was getting the old band together to go on the road and raise the money to stop the bank foreclosing on the orphanage’s mortgage …
Great minds, Gummo.
I can just imagine young Kenneth opening the door and screaming “Jesus Christ, what have I done?” before copping a caning around the knuckles, too.
Ken, these sins of yours – are they bloggable? C’mon, fess up!
(What, you didn’t think nuns read blogs?)
Sister Gianna,
The irritating thing about us unrepentant sinners is that we feel no compulsion whatever to confess merely to gratify the vicarious curiosity of ersatz clergypersons.
what about unabashed voyeurs?
sorry, being an ersatz clergyperson is a bad habit of mine. but like wen, i’m 100% genuine voyeur!
anyway, you seem to be forgetting your initial, incriminating, most repentant sounding “lord forgive me”.
Old habits die hard (no pun intended). And you know what the Jesuits used to say about getting a child at 15 (or thereabouts). Of course, those sorts of statements take on a whole different meaning in the light of latter day revelations about priestly sexual abuse. Speaking of which, I was struck by the following passage from Suzy’s autobiography (the first draft of which was written 20 years ago, long before the current vogue for pursuing priestly abuse):
The nuns tell us what a good Catholic education is all about, preparing us to become good Catholic men and women. The priest takes the boys for football and boxing to make real men of them. Boys caught fighting are put into the sandpit with gloves laced on and the priest stands by while they slug it out and he won’t let them quit until they’re falling down with exhaustion. The best boys get to be altar boys and everyone else is jealous until one of the boys lets on how Altar boys have to suck the priest’s old willy and they’re glad they weren’t chosen.
Posing as a nun is a “bad habit”, Sister Gianna? I’m going to walk away, and assume that wasn’t a deliberate pun. The consequences if I’m wrong are… just… unthinkable… *shudder*
Oh, hello Ken!
My household has found that replacing your doorbell/knocker with a SHIVA chanting one sees off all the skypilots, godbothers, bible-bashers etc. One resounding call to the Hindu lord of creation and destruction has the visitors quaking in their boots :)
side,” she urges early on