I Come from a Land Downunder

outback.jpg

Troppo Contest of the Week!

Continuing the TV theme, I think I watched the worst ever American reality tv show set in Australia last night. Outback Jack. The host is called J. D. Roberto. The premise is that twelve “uptown girls” think they’re going to a mansion to pick a bachelor of their dreams, but instead they fly to Sydney (in evening gowns). But they don’t get to stay in a hotel. Instead they’re herded into a light plane. Then they have to jump out of the plane into the forbidding “Outback”. The girls have names like Summer, Cortney, Harmonie and Marissa. Luckily, “Outback Jack”, who has a knife just like Crocodile Dundee’s, walks out of the bush and he knows his way around an Iguana or two.

According to the episode guide –

On their first full day in the Outback, Jack makes the girls survival kits–bandages, waterproof matches, and the whole deal. He then introduces them to the animals of the Outback and shows them what to do if they encounter one. He lets the ladies meet a monitor lizard, who sits quietly in Jack’s hands, but becomes a woman chaser as soon as he’s released. The girls scramble to escape the rambunctious reptile. Their fear escalates when they’re introduced to a full-grown crocodile. Adrienne tells the viewers, “Jack told us what to do when you encounter a crocodile…you run.” Later, Jack rewards the girls for their bravery by taking them to a magnificent waterfall.

The chicks get to say things like “EEEEEWWWWW, there’s a bug on my Chanel bag”….

So, to cut to the chase (and if you want to short-circuit the next seven episodes, the US internet site linked above reveals which of the belles of the bush Jack chose…), what was the worst reality TV show on Australian TV this year, and why?

NB: Nominations will not be accepted for the Federal Election coverage.

About Mark Bahnisch

Mark Bahnisch is a sociologist and is the founder of this blog. He has an undergraduate degree in history and politics from UQ, and postgraduate qualifications in sociology, industrial relations and political economy from Griffith and QUT. He has recently been awarded his PhD through the Humanities Program at QUT. Mark's full bio is on this page.
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Ann
Ann
2022 years ago

It was bad wasn’t it, and who by the way is “Jack”. The skydiving stunt lost me and the poor girls not having “outlets” for their hairdryers was soo sad.

Mark Bahnisch
Mark Bahnisch
2022 years ago

Forgot that one, Ann – “what kind of outlets?”, innocently says Jack. I also liked “I never go without makeup except when I’m having a facial”…

According to the Courier-Mail today’s tv liftout thingy, Jack’s real name is Vadim Dale. His dad’s name is surprisingly not Alan Dale (of Neighbours and now The OC fame) but apparently the guy who starred in the Peter Jackson ciggie ads. His mum owns a tv production company. No explanation for the pseudonym – what’s wrong with “Outback Vadim”?

He’s a former Human Resources officer and builder. I knew it!

Vadim/Jack says:

“I felt like I was on my own turf in the Outback but trying to communicate with 12 girls at once was pretty difficult. The girls got really catty, which made me pretty emotional, but if I tried to break it out the producers told me to back off.”

The article concludes:

“Dale is now hoping to pick up some work in America.” Presumably not in the construction industry or HR…

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

My god! Trash reality TV is actually staged to attract maximium eyeballs to sell to advertisers? You’ll be discovering steam next.

For my money, the worst reality shows on TV are marketed under the generic brand name “News”.

yellowvinyl
2022 years ago

warning: spoiler! vadim ends up picking the most nauseatingly ikky of the party girls! still, good trashy fun. also fun to see how orstrayia is portrayed.

Down and Out in S
2022 years ago

I’m a little saddened the producers didn’t take them to a B&S ball. After all, the girls are looking for Mr. Right.

blank
blank
2022 years ago

I am one of those cynical people who do not believe that reality tv is actually real.

What sort of visa did those gals have to come to Australia? Did they come on visitor ETAs? Who applied for them?

Strange that all the gals selected just happened to have passorts already, and that they also had their passports with them when they were whisked away.

They also might just notice the length of the flight to Sydney was a teensy bit longer than the average domestic flight.

Amanda
2022 years ago

The worst reality TV show I saw was Chains of Love, although I believe it might be a few years old. I didn’t anything could pass my high tolerance for the cheap and tawdry but apparently so.

Reality shows I enjoyed:
Survivor, contrary to popular perception I thought this season was very good. Up to and including Twila’s hair at the reunion. Best quote probably Sarge about the women sunbaking nude. “I don’t mind nudity. I’ve been to Europe.”

Joe Schmo Show, also a few years old but hilarious.

Vee
Vee
2022 years ago

I remember when they were making the show and had it on the news. I think they mentioned that “outback jack” not to be confused with the retired cop come wrestler is not actually an outback boy but from Melbourne.

yellowvinyl
2022 years ago

oh no, I was so caught up in reading blogs I missed the first ten minutes of Outback Jack!

yellowvinyl
2022 years ago

they’re subtitling aussie-speak!!!!!! is the “outback” accent so unintelligible to a US audience?

Stormwarden
Stormwarden
13 years ago

On behalf of my homeland of America, I am sorry so many of my countrymen are morons (I hail from West Virginia, in a place called Buckhannon). Worst reality show for me? “The Bachelor,” and this comes from someone who is horrified enough by reality without bad shows in the mix.

Just remember, no matter what the network execs tell you: There is no reality in reality TV. NONE.

Fyodor
13 years ago

FMD. There’s a blast from the past: a genuine yellowvinyl sighting.

Personally, I thought The Bachelor was tops teev. Outback Jack? Not so much.