Farce on farce

Not yet being reliably inspired by the blogging muse, I’ve instead been catching up with the rantings of others over the last couple of months of my semi-enforced Internet absence. I noticed that Mark B posted an item a few weeks ago in which he referred to Marx’s immortal observation that great events in history seem to happen twice, the first time as tragedy and the second as farce. In the blogosphere, though, they mostly happen as farce both times!

I see Caz and the crew from The Spin Starts Here got into deep doo doo with the Murdoch press recently for posting a fairly gross but funny (at least to my warped mind) satirical piece about over-exposed, under-talented Aussie pop singer Delta Goodrem. Written by Caz’s partner Hack, the post solicited readers to sign a spoof web petition calling for Goodrem to be crucified at Easter. Tasteless? Without doubt, but what else would you expect at TSSH? You certainly wouldn’t visit Caz et al expecting restrained, academic analysis. Excessive? Offensive to christians? Quite possibly. Personally, I think a little light stoning and perhaps a crown of thorns would have been quite enough (note to any humour-challenged Murdoch hacks – I’m joking, however unfunnily).

Anyway, it seems the TSSH crew were forced to remove the offending post, presumably by threats of legal action (not that any such action would be likely to succeed IMO – although the reference to reports of Delta possibly being shacked up with someone else before she announced her breakup from Mark Philippoussis may be a bit borderline). Despite the offending post’s deletion, anyone who’s interested can still read it here (and there are thinly-veiled references to the whole fiasco here).

Apart from the fact that I find the whole sequence of events both bizarre and faintly amusing, for this wizened old blogger it also had a distinct flavour of deja vu all over again.

Have a look at this post from Tim Blair way back in July 2003, where he hoed into Tim Dunlop and Bright Cold Matt (a blogger who’s now sadly hung up his blogging keyboard) with hobnail boots for daring to suggest that the orgy of publicity at the time surrounding Delta’s cancer condition might have been just a trifle excessive and tiresome. Tim B seems to have felt that it was an unacceptable breach of taste to attack someone who was suffering from cancer. Generally I would agree, but the point I think Tim D and Matt were was making was that Goodrem (or her publicity agents) were “cashing in” on her disease to generate a seemingly endless stream of media coverage for her. It’s essentially the same point that Hack made in his Crucify Delta! post a few weeks ago. I have no idea whether that claim is true or not, but it’s certainly true that her cancer condition generated an extraordinary amount of publicity. It shouldn’t be regarded as off-limits to raise publicly the question of whether publicity of that sort is orchestrated. Least of all by Tim Blair, who only shortly before he ripped into Tim and Matt had been excoriating Adelaide magistrate Brian Deegan for exploiting his Bali victim status to continually criticise the Howard government. Cliches about sauce, geese and ganders spring to mind. I don’t think either Deegan or Goodrem necessarily deserved an unconditional “leave me alone” card; it all depends on circumstances.

I can’t help wondering why RWDBs are so solicitous and defensive of this publicity-hungry popette. Could Delta Goodrem be the secret love child of John Howard and Bronwyn Bishop, perhaps? Probably not, she’s not ugly enough. But there must be an answer. Why is Delta the Darling of the Right?

About Ken Parish

Ken Parish is a legal academic, with research areas in public law (constitutional and administrative law), civil procedure and teaching & learning theory and practice. He has been a legal academic for almost 20 years. Before that he ran a legal practice in Darwin for 15 years and was a Member of the NT Legislative Assembly for almost 4 years in the early 1990s.
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Tim
Tim
2022 years ago

Ken, my “interest” in the story was nothing like you suggest. I really don’t want to go over this again, but the record needs to be clear (probably impossible even after this time). Matt’s post was looking for a word to describe his feelings. His feelings. I suggested ennui. That was it. Having been out of Australia for over a year at that stage, I didn’t even know who Delta Goodrum was. I read Matt’s post entirely in terms of the word he was looking for. And so I made a suggestion. Read the comments: I didn’t even know what the accusation was at first.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

No worries Tim. Sorry for the error. I think my characterisation probably describes Matt’s position reasonably accurately though, if not your own. I hope you don’t get attacked by the RWDBs again. Mind you, they’d have to queue up behind the blog spammers at the moment!!! When do you expect to be back in operation at Surfdom?

Irant
2022 years ago

While Delta is anything but ugly, am I the only one to find her utterly devoid of sexuality? Her beauty seems so manufactured which is probably why. But the idea of doing the (insert your favourite euphemism for sex here) with Delta does not appeal at all.

Caz
Caz
2022 years ago

Ken, so far we have had no threats of legal action. Death threats? Hell yes!

Caz
Caz
2022 years ago

Incidentally, the blog herald and several other places on the internet have speculated about pending legal action, which is completely baseless. None of these people contacted us to check before publishing their half-baked theories. Can I sue?

Geoff Honnor
Geoff Honnor
2022 years ago

Who is Delta Goodrem?

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

Caz

No. If you weren’t threatened with legal action, why did you remove the post? Was it purely because the volume of hits and comments it generated was crashing your host’s server?

Caz
Caz
2022 years ago

Partly that. Partly because the petition itself was hosted externally, and couldn’t easily be moderated. It was attracting all sorts of nutty comments that we would normally delete off TSSH instantly if they were in our regular comments. After global exposure, it just got out of hand.

We’re still getting loads of searches for this too.

C.L.
2022 years ago

I have no idea who Delta Goodrem is.

But I think for the left Julia Gillard is the worshipped and hitherto unknown love-child of Gough Whitlam and Joan Kirner.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

I doubt it CL. She isn’t tall or wide enough, and neither Gough nor Joan have red hair. Peter Beattie might have been implicated, except that he’s not old enough.

C.L.
2022 years ago

:)

cs
cs
2022 years ago

A warped and wizened old bloke you may well be Ken, but you sure do good blog, even in your faux-dotage. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve idly wondered what the hell it is that binds the RWDBs to Delta, of the multitude of popettes on offer. Gotta be a story here somewhere.

saint
2022 years ago

Oh gosh now I am cracking up again over David Tiley’s insane image of Beazley’s and Vanstone’s pachyderm love child….

Phil
2022 years ago

She is of course the Stepford Idol, the perfect embodiment of a particular strain of white Australian aspiration sold by the mass media, and as Irant says, devoid of any real sexuality. Just the way the RWDB’s like their women. Corporate confections, full of empty calories and empty talent with no chance of her turning them over and giving it to them in return.

The closest she’s come to any kind of messy humanity is getting (euphemism here) and dumped by the playboy Scud, he probably realised she’d only ever lie back and think of Australian Idol and the glory years of soapdom. But that little incident was quickly scrubbed clean and spiked, never to be mentioned again in polite company.

jen
jen
2022 years ago

Phil the Stepford idol is a washing machine that cooks AND fucks.

‘Definitely must fuck’ (intonation – Rainman )

jen
jen
2022 years ago

…. fucking is real sexuality is it not?

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

I imagine they mean “sexual allure” or “sexual vibe”, which I agree Goodrem conspicuously lacks. Wilfully obtuse or a bad day? Or both?

James Hamilton
James Hamilton
2022 years ago

“Could Delta Goodrem be the secret love child of John Howard and Bronwyn Bishop, perhaps? Probably not, she’s not ugly enough.”

Not so fast, Ken. Have you seen Russ Hinze’s daughter?

“Can’t tell you how many times I’ve idly wondered what the hell it is that binds the RWDBs to Delta, of the multitude of popettes on offer. Gotta be a story here somewhere.”

Dunno the answer to that one Chris. Maybe she’s the only one that will have us??

Personally, I’d trade her tomorrow if you gave us Beth.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

“Have you seen Russ Hinze’s daughter?”

Yes, but what did Russ’s old cheese look like? It’s a taller order if there are fuglies on both sides.

Phil
2022 years ago

Jen, the Stepford Idol is a receptacle or blank slate for a certain kind of mans fantasy. It’s not whether she does or does not? It’s what does it really mean?

As you know full well sexuality in not just a technical exercise but also incorporates power, something we all use in the eternal dynamic between men and women.

The Stepford Idol is someone who validates this particular mans self assessment of his power, and as such he needs a woman who is that ‘washing machine’ yet does not attempt to threaten his self assessment.

It is my cursory judgement that Goodrem gives that to a certain class of man – the currently triumphant RWDB’s – now can we get back to discussing Miranda Devine, the thinking mans Stepford.

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

As some Russian guy said on being exposed to US newscasters for the first time: “Their only distingushing feature is that they have none.”

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

I’ve met Kristy Hinze (briefly) and she seemed very affable and down to earth, albeit rising at least six feet above it. She’s a big woman – but better proportioned than her dad. However I’ve yet to judge her credentials as a Police Minister.

yellowvinyl
2022 years ago

Kristy Hinze is Russ Hinze’s grandaughter.

as to Delta – boring, submissive, obeys her mum implicitly, “entrepreneurial” will never ever start a new relationship while an old one’s going on, sings about lerve – the perfect RWDB pinup.

jen
jen
2022 years ago

fuck off parish

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

Have another gin, Martha. Obscenity is a poor substitute for wit, my little viper.

James Farrell
James Farrell
2022 years ago

My kingdom (such as it is) for a picture of Kristy.

Nickakov
Nickakov
2022 years ago

Er Ken and jen, Honey and I were thinking we might to have hit the road now. Early start and all that. We can see you’re busy.

jen
jen
2022 years ago

Have a drink.
Yes you puffy
You’ll have another,won’t you, you big strong wonderful…
Stepford husband
… I’m wearing pants because somebody has to, but I am not a monster.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

Not a monster? Your unique blend of arrogance and self-pity is so endearing. Martha? Anu? At least you won’t be able to blame me for causing an eating disorder, not after yesterday at the gym. What’s that about over-eating? This merlot tastes strange, darling. Was there anything wrong with the cork? Oh god I’m so tired ……

Jason Soon
Jason Soon
2022 years ago

?????!!!!!!!

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

So where do you keep the…eh, euphemisms?

jen
jen
2022 years ago

nobody said anything about overeating young man -and I’d thank you to note the painters are practically champing at the bit to get into the office, so will you please get out of the bath and speak to jen – she’s been sitting at that keyboard now for hours and … no-one said anything about anybody being sick to death young man.

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

“..we’re merely walking what’s left of our wits. Don’t pay any attention to it.”

jen
jen
2022 years ago

So, you are not enamoured of the redoubtable Mrs Glass, brainchild of J.D. Salinger and mother of the genius tribe that peopled the popular radio series Wise Child and most particularly my hero Zoey?

Yes I will / I am / moving bag and baggage into my own fantasy world.

…. a world of diminished responsibility.

saint
2022 years ago

*walks in, sits down, reaches for the popcorn*

cs
cs
2022 years ago

“Miranda Devine, the thinking mans Stepford”

While we’re all waiting for the truth about Ken and Mrs Glass, excuse my appreciative repetition of Phil’s coinage, which, in the space of less than 24 hours, has already become common currency in certain circles.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

cs

Here I was last night in full-on George and Martha mode, and the smartarse bitch changed her author on me in midstream (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0316769495/104-8085746-5028756). I emphatically deny any relationship between myself and Mrs Glass, although I DO on very odd occasions have urges to paint sundry rooms of the house (though not while sitting in the bathtub because we don’t actually have one). On the other hand, there’s no doubt that Jen frequently sees herself as an ageing, marginally mellower Franny.

tim g
tim g
2022 years ago

Worst comments thread ever.

(With apologies to the Comic Book Shop Guy.)

Nabakov
Nabakov
2022 years ago

Apparently Ken and jen are doing it again next month…on ice.

jen
jen
2022 years ago

This morning I was rampaging madly with Mrs Glass and Martha. Tonight I’m just foolish old jen who’ll brew up a pot o’ tea and take herself to bed. Before anything else happens.

les bowyer
les bowyer
2022 years ago

D is on my mind constantly; had = to; two 4.5 mile walks today with ‘D’, she is dimming my vision, must stop this wanky panky. still waiting for ISBN number of J L Spencer’s book waving goodbye to a thousand flies.Les.

les bowyer
les bowyer
2022 years ago

D is on my mind constantly; had = to; two 4.5 mile walks today with ‘D’, she is dimming my vision, must stop this wanky panky. still waiting for ISBN number of J L Spencer’s book waving goodbye to a thousand flies.Les.

les bowyer
les bowyer
2022 years ago

D is on my mind constantly; had = to; two 4.5 mile walks today with ‘D’, she is dimming my vision, must stop this wanky panky. still waiting for ISBN number of J L Spencer’s book waving goodbye to a thousand flies.Les.

les bowyer
les bowyer
2022 years ago

D is on my mind constantly; had = to; two 4.5 mile walks today with ‘D’, she is dimming my vision, must stop this wanky panky. still waiting for ISBN number of J L Spencer’s book waving goodbye to a thousand flies.Les.

cs
cs
2022 years ago

A rather sour comment tim g. Classic Troppo, I waywardly thought.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

cs

Yeh. What you said. This comment thread might not have been great, but what right does he have to complain? After all, we give you thousands of hours of entertainment for free. And it was at least as good as Itchy and Scratchy.

Ken Parish
Ken Parish
2022 years ago

BTW I still haven’t deciphered Les Bowyer’s comment. Anyone got any clues?

Geoff Honnor
Geoff Honnor
2022 years ago

It’s either an existentialist riff invoking an almost neo-Kantian life force wellspring or else a coded takeout order from Hungry Jack’s.

Leslie Bowyer
Leslie Bowyer
2022 years ago

To refresh, click Back and read original comments then return. Equation, 1 Dog flog = energy loss of a 4.5 mile jog,(A well known fact). By 2 or more excessive energy loss plus impaired vision, although it would be unfair to refer to a bloke using a white cane as a Dog Flogger. Lesbo.

Leslie Bowyer
Leslie Bowyer
2022 years ago

my Delta comment came up four times, I found it enjoyable but tiring. I have also read ‘wanker of the week’and super nerd politician geezer Alan Cadman’s abortion comments. Such a pity his begetter failed to snip his testimonials 68 years ago, whereby aborting this creep. Lesbo.