Mr Joker is a character in a Bob Dylan song. He has contacted me because he is unhappy with the circumstances of his existence: "Can you please tell Bob to rewrite my life?" he pleads, "It sucks".
No whimpering Mr Joker. It’s time to take responsibility.
Mr Joker cries out that "There must be some kind of way out of here" but seems not to realise that he has found a way out simply by breaking free of the words in the song and asking me for help
No doubt some of you will say that our Mr Joker is not the same character as the joker in the song — that this real joker has no existence outside of the song. Clearly this is nonsense. How many times have you watched a character from one TV series show up on another? Did you complain when Bobby Donnell from The Practice showed up on Ally McBeal?
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Some of you might say that it can only be the same joker if it was Bob Dylan who wrote the question that appeared in my comments box — the a character is only real when written about by its creator. Also nonsense. If this was true then Bart Simpson would only be the real Bart Simpson when an episode of the Simpsons was written by Matt Groening.
But, again you might object (in that irritating whiny voice), surely the original author has to give their permission? And again, the idea is nonsense. If it were true then fan fiction would be unintelligible gibberish and you would have handed over responsibility for literary interpretation to lawyers. Do you seriously think that someone like James McConvill can tell you how to read a song or novel correctly?
Just as the whimpering Mr Joker must take responsibility for his life, you readers you must accept responsibility for reading. Don’t whine to me that your university English tutor says "the conventions of the genre dictate that…" Ask who is doing the dictating. The answer is that it’s you my dear readers. You are the dictators. Be brave. Take a deep breath and make Mr Joker real.
Congratulations Mr Joker. You are free. Now go away and leave me alone.
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Oh please Dr Troppo! There’s nothing worse than the rantings of a drunken sock puppet. Step away from the keyboard and go have a nice lie down. I’ll take care of things here while you’re gone.
What about my malaise, eh? Much more fascinating than that navel gazer who wrote you using my moniker. Or do only the arty-farty Joker creations count, eh?? Bill Finger/Bob Kane were artists too, you know.
Dear Dr Troppo,
Have you studied the methods of Jaques Lacan (distantly related to Jacques Chester).
Are you in fact, or have you ever actually been Jacques Lacan?
J’Accuse!
Regards,
Emile.
help! I can’t find my homonculi! am I a zombie?
No, Homer. You are Jacques Lacan.
Read up on the “mirror stage” of infantile development.
Dear Dr Troppo
Is this sequence of posts becoming an in-joke?
If I get the jokes, should I give up on my LEFTOID HUMOURLESNESS and take up punning full time?
Your secret admirer
Kimberella xx
Ms Kimberella, can you please tell me a little more about your leftoid humourlessness and why this worries you? As a number of readers share this problem Dr Troppo would like to discuss it in more detail.
But please, no puns and keep the transferrence under control.
Dear Doctor
Do you feel that fan fiction has crossed the line and is now in need of legislative intervention?
They should never have been allowed to make this:
http://community.livejournal.com/mythbusterslash/2035.html
who said I was Homer Paxton?
is there a ghost in the machine?
Dear Dr Troppo
If James McConvill had his way and all laws were “ended”, would there not be little sense in Universities continuing to pay senior lecturers in Law? But I guess that would leave more time for watching “Ghost” on dvd, bonking and admiring bananas.
Dear Dr Troppo
Is James McConvill
1) a misunderstood prophet, visionary and genius
2) crazy as a fox
3) a publicity hound
4) our generation’s Ern Malley
5) all of the above?
Kimberella. That’s a cute sounding name. How old are you? What are you wearing?
Dr Troppo! I’m locking you out of the waiting room until Sunday. You may respond to your readers’ questions then. I’ve spoken to you before about interacting with commenters when you’ve been drinking.
Ms Kimberella, I’m terribly, terribly sorry. Dr Troppo can behave very badly when he’s intoxicated. There’s no excuse for it.
If you’d like to explain your problem in more detail I’ll make sure Dr Troppo gives you a proper response on Sunday. It’s the least he can do.
Ms Winter, you say that your example of fan fiction should never have been created. Yet you are encouraging other readers to look at it.
What exactly is troubling you? Dr Troppo can’t help unless you explain your problem properly.
Mr Bahnisch, Dr Troppo has reviewed your internet postings and is aware of your intense interest in Mr McConvill and his work.
Dr Troppo would like to discuss this issue further. How often do you find yourself thinking about Mr McConvill? How does this make you feel?
Everybody needs a punching bag, even someone as seemingly meek as Herr Bahnisch, ja?
Professor Emeritus
Herr Dottor Augustus von Goyim-Schnaubel,
University of Vienna
Help! I’m being oppressed!
Help! I’m being oppressed!
My dear Dottor Troppo
It is incumbent upon me to protest regarding the state of your clinic. How can you leave not one but two prospective patients of yours in such a distressed state quivering in your waiting rooms while you imbibe from the waters of Bacchus??
This is an appalling breach of trust on your part and I fear that if adequate steps are not taken soon, I shall have to report your blatant malpractice to the international authorities. You are a disgrace to our honourable and wise profession which depends upon the constant maintenance of the better angels of our nature when in the presence of these fragile souls, ja?
Herr Bahnisch und Fraulein Kimberella, if you seek a more attentive counsellor, I have left my business cards in your respective pockets.
Professor Emeritus
Herr Dottor Augustus von Goyim-Schnaubel,
University of Vienna
Thanks to the wonders of freedom of choice and privatised medicine, Herr Dottor, I can indeed consider voting with my foot :)
Ms Winter, are you being oppressed too? Or would you like to discuss your problem?
Help, I’m being oppressed!
I am indeed being opressed.
I’m troubled by the issue of mythbusters slash. I’d like to know the Dr.’s view on making things unlawful due to creepiness.
Also, I wanted everyone else to be as creeped out as I am.
Perhaps my problem is a lack of consistency in matters of creepiness?
I see, Ms Winter.
Is it the idea of mythbusters slash in general that you find creepy or this particular example?
Which character’s behaviour do you find the most disturbing? Why is that?
Ms Winter, Dr Troppo has called on his mobile and wants to know how you would feel about fan fiction or RPF using LP bloggers as characters.
I think that would be incredibly creepy. Why, do you have some?
My dear receptionist
Your heart may be in the right place but I question how you are qualified to be treating Fraulein Winter. It is a very shoddy practice that your employer has obliged you to work in and it is a shambles, the way he is passing you instructions over the phone. But I have no choice but to report this severe case of malpractice to the authorities.
Fraulein Winter, please take one of my cards and call me on Monday.
Professor Emeritus
Herr Dottor Augustus von Goyim-Schnaubel,
University of Vienna
Ms Winter, As I understand it, Dr Troppo was just exploring your feelings of creepiness. He was not proposing to share his collection of blogger-based RPF with you.
However, if you’re interested I believe that Professor Goyim-Schnabel has some slash featuring Jason Soon. Perhaps if you ask him nicely he might share.
Dear Professor,
Why ‘Dottor’? Did you get your degree in Italy or is that your middle name? Or do you have a speech impediment?
Dear Pedantic Bastard
My dear, beloved but now departed mother was Italian (I think my mixed heritage keeps me in a state of perpetual temperamental balance) and so the ‘Dottor’ is in honour of her memory. Do you have a problem with that? Does your choosing to call yourself ‘Bastard’ suggest a childhood far, far less happy than mine?
Professor Emeritus
Herr Dottor Augustus von Goyim-Schnaubel,
University of Vienna
I demand an apology from Pedantic Bastard for ridiculing the way I write my title which was simply in honour of my dear, departed sainted mother.
Professor Goyim-Schnaubel – This is attention seeking behaviour. Please leave Mr Bastard alone. I will not tolerate this kind of behaviour in my waiting room.
If you would like to be attended to you may approach Dr Troppo with a problem. I should warn you, however, that he is not in the least interested in your relationship with your mother.
I dare you to kick me out on my arse, Ms Receptionist. Or put me on your knee and spank me.
Professor Goyim-Schnaubel – a good sock puppet never lets their accent slip. Your puppeteer is getting over-excited.
It is Professor Emeritus, thank you very much. And my dear departed mama was half-Australian and liked using the word ‘arse’ a lot in our family conversations. Why do you keep ridiculing my childhood??