Sshh! Don’t tell anyone …

Last night was Cracker Night in Darwin, when every bogan fucktard  blasts the hell out of their neighbourhood until 3 or 4 in the morning. It’s also V8 Supercars weekend, when the self-same fucktards spend all day watching gas-guzzling hotted-up family cars  circling round and round and round a track one behind the other  for no useful purpose.

I suddenly had an astounding realisation. Not only do  I hate cracker night and have no interest whatever in the V8 Supercars, but I’m also totally uninterested in fishing,  hardly ever  drink beer, and get bored after watching AFL football for any more than 5 minutes.

Clearly I’m not a true Territorian, despite having lived  in Darwin  for over 23 years now.   I hope no-one here finds out, they might tar and feather me and run me out of town.  

About Ken Parish

Ken Parish is a legal academic, with research areas in public law (constitutional and administrative law), civil procedure and teaching & learning theory and practice. He has been a legal academic for almost 20 years. Before that he ran a legal practice in Darwin for 15 years and was a Member of the NT Legislative Assembly for almost 4 years in the early 1990s.
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Dan
Dan
15 years ago

Hehe … perhaps you’re a latte-sipper trapped in a frontiersman’s body after all :)

Local PasserBy
Local PasserBy
15 years ago

“Clearly I’m not a true Territorian, despite having lived in Darwin for over 23 years now. I hope no-one here finds out, they might tar and feather me and run me out of town. ”

23 years? Just a latecomer, sir. Been here about twice that myself. And I too have no interest in the booze and car and firework component of the local culture. Cracker night is just an annoying noisy fire hazard to quiet flammable rural bush-block dwelling me.

On the other hand, ain’t the local ‘winter’ weather nice?

Rafe
15 years ago

Bored watching AFL!?

Try rugby league some time. I am addicted in a small way to both and I would have thought the skills and athleticism of AFL would be obvious enough to anyone, even a devotee of the round ball game.

But in terms of boredom, the spectacle of rubgy league fowards running into each other and playing stacks on the mill would have to beat AFL by a mile, although of course it is relieved when someone manages an offload or they put on a backline movement.

Paul Watson
15 years ago

Sheesh, Ken. Sounds like the “Early Build-Up” phenomenon of recent years (well, I remember it from the mid-90s, anyway) has just smashed through all previous records. Isn’t *July* in Darwin low-humidity and balmy nights?

FDB
FDB
15 years ago

“Not only do I hate cracker night and have no interest whatever in the V8 Supercars, but I’m also totally uninterested in fishing, hardly ever drink beer, and get bored after watching AFL football for any more than 5 minutes.”

Good lord, man! What DO you do with your time? Lots of dusting to be done in the ivory tower, I presume. Drop by mine for a spot of billiards and single malt, won’t you? If you can get past the rabble of bogan fucktards, I’ll toss you a rope ladder.

Seriously, though. No fishing? You’d be happier in my Fitzroy than your Fitzroy creek.