He aint heavy, he¢â¬â¢s my handbag.

Melbourne’s Herald Sun today warns Melbourne’s fashion conscious women about the dangers of those stylish extra large handbags

WOMEN are risking health problems by carrying fashionably huge handbags.

It’s the load on the musculoskeletal system that’s the real worry.   The Herald Sun has weighed the handbags of Melbourne women and found them to be “lugging 5Kg apiece”.

The Herald Sun offers handy handbag pointers to the hip behandbagged chick about town.

  • Swap shoulders from time to time.
  • Don’t let your handbag get too heavy
  • Make a couple of trips between the shops and the car instead of loading your handbag right up.

Club Troppo has interviewed a number of handbags to verify these claims.   Most weigh significantly more than 5kg, but it’s rare evening indeed when that weight is applied to their wife’s musculoskeletal system.   Frankly they can’t see what all the complaining is about.

This entry was posted in Humour. Bookmark the permalink.
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
23 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
David Jackmanson
14 years ago

I bet you didn’t do proper interviews, I bet you just talked to one or two handbags around the office.

Shows the sorry state of blogging today. No substance.

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

A typically latte left comment from you JacBootson. Rex’s post is the epitome of blogging excellence according to the criteria laid down authoritatively by Blogging Godfather Tim Blair. Rex doesn’t use the personal pronoun even once (although it is about a chick’s issue, which is a bit of a worry).

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

lacking substance! The middle aged woman’s handbag is a cornucopia of useful items that materialise when required. Pencils, a small screw driver, a paper clip, a blank CD, 2 sound track CD’s, one plastic folder, 2 broken erasers, small nuts and bolts, a plastic bracelet… – a close cousin of Bessie’s kimono pockets, specifically the kimono pockets in the bathroom scene of Franny and Zoey – J.D.Salinger.

Rex
Rex
14 years ago

I can assure you David, the interviewing process was as statistically significant as the Herald Sun’s handbag weighing.

Geoff Honnor
Geoff Honnor
14 years ago

Rex, this works brilliantly as an ironic commentary about the tendency of certain society ladies – of a certain age – to be accompanied to social functions by well appointed guys who aren’t all that interested in their gynecology.

What’s a Lindsay Lohan?

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

I give up. What is a Lindsay Lohan?

Geoff Honnor
Geoff Honnor
14 years ago

According to the Herald Sun link, a style arbiter for big handbags. She’s also an “actor” (so Google claim), who wrote a semi-literate paean of praise to the recently deceased Robert Altman, hung out with Paris Hilton and is now in rehab at the age of 20. She was also recently photographed wearing no underwear as she got out of a car.

It’s puzzling. You’d think she’d have room for emergency photo-op undies in a big handbag……………..

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

yes but not the wit to put them on….

she was great in Parent Trap

Angharad
Angharad
14 years ago

Club Troppo has interviewed a number of handbags … but it’s rare evening indeed when that weight is applied to their wife’s musculoskeletal system.

What? you’re all married to the same woman?

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

‘all married the same woman’

You got it. A Muslim brotherhood, masquerading as lunatic lefties. And the little wife only wants to be left alone. With this lot banging their keyboards night and day she’s got that in the bag.

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

jen’s been complaining a lot recently about being tired.

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

bait

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

Franny and Zoey … Franny and Zoey. My goodness. You’re going to have to do a bit more reading than that, young woman, if you expect to do a Masters at Monash, or even UNE for that matter. And I use “young woman” allegorically.

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

the two pronged personal attack
1. my struggle with late onset illiteracy
2. my dismay at the irreversible horrors of the aging process
we live in seperate houses but we share a cleaner. Ken mainly shares the cleaner.

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

“we live in seperate houses but we share a cleaner.”

That’s why I have my doubts about the tiredness excuse. Fortunately I can curl up with a good book and a warm mug of cocoa, hoping that jen might somehow learn to spell “separate” by osmosis … wherever she is. Can anyone tell me what a faghag is? It’s tragic being so old you’ve got no-one to ask about the slang any more. If only Phil Nitschke’s book hadn’t been banned …

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

now I’m offended
how am I, knee deep in cleaners, expected to know what the fuck Phil Nitchke is writing about? Although I did hear only last week from Parish himself (lazing in state on the sofa as is his want) that the bloke was on the nose. he reckons he smells or did during the nuclear warship in the harbour up here hassle. I would have expected a little more solidarity among comrades than that.
Also, I agree that a decent deoderant is never wasted in the N.T.
The old fella did recieve a particularly fine brand of Chanel after shave ‘allure homme’ it’s called, (come here baby) but he steadfastly refuses to have anything to do with it.
I know he secretly thinks it will shrink his dick – and at his age who can blame him?

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

And “Nitchke” has an “s” in the middle of it somewhere. And deodorant only has one “e”. The Blogging Brotherhood will need to get that moron Tim Blair onto you if you’re not careful. He’s very strong on spelling and punctuation, not to mention the central importance of never using “I”. You used it 6 times in the last comment alone. Aah the egocentricity of youth deluded middle age.

And why are you antagonising Nitschke for me, you scheming bitch? I might need that smelly bastard one of these days, maybe even sooner than I imagine.

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
good night

Ken Parish
Admin
Ken Parish(@ken-parish)
14 years ago

Tragic really. Jen claims she’s too tired to carry on the semi-witty comment box banter any longer. But why? I torture myself again and again, tossing and turning sleeplessly night after night …

Jen keeps returning to reading “Emergency Sex” between each heartlessly glib comment. She bought it for me for Christmas … thought I’d enjoy it, she said. I had to explain to poor little Jessica a few minutes ago that it was really about UN peaceworkers who occasionally ventured a bit of hubba hubba as a momentary release from the relentless slaughter-interspered-with-tedium of their daily lives. Not unlike my own experience really, except for the hubba hubba … Phil … forgive me, I didn’t mean it.

David Jackmanson
14 years ago

A typically latte left comment from you JacBootson.

I just don’t understand what everyone has against milky coffee.

Rex
Rex
14 years ago

Geoff, I had in mind the henpecked variety actually. Still, the result is the same.

david tiley
14 years ago

Now that I have learnt I am a hard, hard, leftie from your post above, I will have to post humorless and irony-drained comments.

I will just practice with this….

The Herald-Sun wouldn’t be telling posties and garbos to make more than one trip with a five kilo load.

Now why didn’t that comment give me a righteous glow? Must be the use of the word “I”.

Helen
14 years ago

But, the “I” wasn’t really in your comment proper.