Given the slow and painful journey of middle-aged twice-bitten love, I was a bit disconcerted to read today's quotable quote in the NT News. It was by Bertrand Russell, and said:
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.
I personally prefer another quote from the great man, which adorns the masthead of the Bertrand Russell Society website:
"The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge."
But neither really captures the spirit as far as I'm concerned. Fortunately, this afternoon I received an email from blogger Francis Xavier Holden, who drew my attention to the website of a poet friend of his who goes by the nom de plume Frank Faust. Of the many poems on his site, I was taken with this one:
Movements
#1
it should not cause surprise
that there are terrors
in the pre-dawn morning
at the coldest of hours
before darkness edges into light
#2
the answer to your question
lies in the paradox
of a driving need
for distance and separation
operating in tandem
with the fear of dying alone
#3
sometimes it seems
that there is a very fine line to walk
between mutual pleasures
and subtle exploitation
#4
there is no real basis
for believing that
the co-location
of a toothbrush in the rack
holds significance beyond
courtesy and convenience
#5
many things are done
in the name of love
these are however largely false
it is probably the case that
more importance should attach
to those acts which suggest endurance
#6
it may not take long
on occasion merely a day or two
other times perhaps weeks
but do not doubt
that it will come
and negotiation will not
be of great assistance
#7
it is useful on occasion
to consider implications
and their consequences
before rushing to assume
a vulnerable position
#8
you may wish to reconsider
based on your own assessment
of the capacity you hold
to cope with misadventure
#9
with the passing of time
there sometimes emerges
a level of equilibrium
from within which it is possible
to see things clearly
and with an acceptable sense
of perspective
~
We're quite a bit beyond that point now, I think. Frank Faust's many love poems (of which the one above is quite early in the sequence) depict a growth and deepening of love too, but then decay and loss. So maybe Russell had a point. I'm an eternal cautious optimist though, and I can't be what I'm not. Nevertheless, these poems speak to me more truly than Bertrand Russell's glib quote.
PS - While I'm on a late Friday arvo whimsicality kick, be sure to read this post by Christopher Sheil. And ask yourself the question: Are you (or is Chris) a cretan, fool, moron or lunatic?
I like this:
"it is useful on occasion
to consider implications
and their consequences
before rushing to assume
a vulnerable position "
Chris would have all bloggers as loons, but some us are definitely loonier than the others!
Siggie Freud arrived in USA - famous.
As he stepped off plane.
USA reporter asks: "What is the secret of happiness Mr Freud" (side note - another nationality might have asked "secret of life").
Freud replied: "To Work and to Love"
Reporter: "Mr Freud, but tell us, which part is the most important?"
Freud: "The and"
All fabulous stuff.
I can't wait 'til this post scrolls off the top of your page. While I am often wrng, the headline is depressing for some reason.
- a love poem to take seriously. Love is a very serious business and i think the key word in this one is endurance - romantic love and sweet fuck are there too - it's not often the 2 ideas are together. funny that when a relationship is like in the movies it is fucked - when it is a calculating assessment of what consitutes a good life it works - falling madly in love is for those who have lots of time and space to spare - me? I'm busy.
Russell we could keep it here indefinitely - the comment box mania is upon me - 'wrng' that's how fonzie says it - remember in Happy Days when he had to admit he was wrong and tried really hard to apologise because Richie was his good mate? - and he almost did it 'wrng'.
G'day jen,
While I would like to be able to say that my "wrng" was a conscious homage to the Fonz, it was nothing more than typing with a toddler on my lap.
At least a typo like that works better in a post where I am admitting I am often wrong than in one of those posts in which someone is claiming that nothing can go WRNG!