While absent-mindedly sauntering home the other night from a little Melbourne city gathering, I was shaken from my reverie by a fellow who adopted a strange stance as I approached.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that he had lifted one leg from the sidewalk, and swung it sideways, as though it was a pendulum starting its outward journey. At the same time he brought his knee forward and twisted his foot out in an arc. To complete the contortions he leant forward and arched his back thrusting his backside to the night air.

I presume this strange display was to facilitate the escape of wind, because he let rip with an enormous fart and accompanied its dying stages with a mighty groan of relief, and a loud Excuse Me to the street in general.

I wouldnt normally have given a second thought to this but for the demonstration of good manners at the end. Its a reminder what a proper upbringing, and a private school education can bring.